Failure

So I realize I haven't posted anything in a while. I've been busy, and when I haven't been busy I'm just so exhausted. But this is a short thought from something I wrote the other day. I didn't really elaborate on it because I'm just so tired. It kind of emphasizes what I think a lot of teens go through with pressure to succeed and all of that stuff. So here it is:

Failure.
Why do we worry so much about it?
What is the definition?
As long as I'm happy, does it really matter?

Thoughts

When thoughts wander off, what are you to do? Are you supposed to follow them where they go, or try to turn them around? Can you help what you think or is it all up to chance? This is something to ponder.
I think that to a certain extent, you can control what you think. Sometimes you can't control what pops into your head. On occasion, it is something that maybe needs to be thought, you just never knew it. Yet other times, you can and definitely need to control what you are thinking. You can also control whether or not you are going to follow those thoughts.
And about following thoughts. I think that some thoughts are meant to be followed; pondered. But sometimes, thoughts can be dangerous if you follow them. Escpecially the "what if's." Let me tell you from personal experience that quite often, those are not thoughts to follow if you are searching for any form of peace or contentment in this life. Unless you plan to act on those "what if's."
To sum it all up, sometimes I think you should follow thoughts. They can lead to new ideas and feelings that you never had before, which can be dangerous and mind-opening all in one. There are other times where thoughts will lead nowhere good, in which case you shouldn't follow them. Also, you can control what you think to some extent, although it can be very difficult at times. The question is, are you exercising that control?

So Here's a Little Bit...

I'm not starting off with anything super deep. These are two things that I wrote in August 2008, during a rough point in my life.

Here's the first one:

Completely lost as to what's going on
Only hanging on by one thread
Not understanding
Feeling frustrated
Used
Sad and hurting
In a lost state of mind
Only trying to figure out God's will
Not knowing where to turn

Here's the second:

Fed up
Really annoyed
Utterly in despair
So mad
Ticked
Ready to throw in the towel
Angry
Through
Exasperated
Done

So I know they're not the greatest, but it was a couple years ago, and it just kind of describes what I was feeling. So don't be too hard on me. (:

Decisions

So I'm trying to decide and I want some opinions. I kind of want to post some stuff that I've written in the past and even some stuff that I'm writing now. The only thing is, it's pretty personal stuff and I'm a bit nervous about putting stuff from so deep inside me out there for everyone to see. What do you guys think? Should I post some of it or not?

Security

Have you ever felt secure around someone? I'm not talking in that they're huge and can beat up anyone who tries to mess with you (although that may help sometimes). I'm talking this person just makes you feel safe when you're around them, or even thinking about them. You don't have to worry about them hurting you, or letting anyone else. You know that no matter what happens, you will always be able to call this person a friend and confide everything in them. You know that they will always be there to listen, no matter what the situation, whether they agree or not. You know that they won't judge you, even if they think you're wrong. They always know the right thing to say, and if they don't, the just show you that they're there. And they always will be, side by side, or half-way across the world.
Have you ever experienced something like this? And if you have, you should never let this person/friend/significant other/whatever the relationship go. No matter what.
...Right?

Fearless

If you were, what would you do? What are some of the things that you would give anything to do but are too afraid to? I am ashamed to say that I have quite a few. But there is one at the top of the list that I would give anything to be able to get off my chest but I can't.
I would tell him. I would let him know the hurt that he caused me. I would tell him the tears I shed on his account. I would make him aware that he almost killed me. I would shout at him. Scream that it kills me to see him going through his life a changed person without even realizing the pain he caused me, while the memories still haunt me.
That is just one of the things that I would do if I were fearless. What about you?